The Full Monty

Full Monty is just another name for the Full MaRathon... 42.195 kms of nerve breaking, body shattering and a Dead Brain... This is what you are looking at once you have commenced your journey..... Mind you Its a journey and not a run..taking you through various ups and down!

Its a suicidal run if you not practiced at all... And high efficacy-Self inflicting if you have practiced...

Coming out of illness with no practice I was on a suicidal track to glory..

On 17th Jan I started one such journey with two of my frnds( Ghoda & Gandhi) ... A self excruciating journey...!

On the start line I met the running stalwarts of my running world.. Bhasker Dada ,Madhur , and Dr Roy( 78 yrs old)...

Bhasker Desai(BD) is "The GOD"( I mean tht in every literal sense) . He is someone whom every athlete would be envy of and proud of too...

BD is 58 yrs old now... When I first met him at Arey colony for a practice run he out ran me by by abt 10 mins in a 18 km run.. Then I again met him at SCMM-09 . BD did HM in 1:45 and I in 2:20.... Beating me by a good 35 mins...

This time again we in MM, running the FM... BD does that in 5 hrs..Without training a single day in last 5 months,,,!!!

Madhur,45 yrs old and a seasoned runner finishes in 5:15

So that is why I call BD "The God"!! Hail GOD BD.....

Coming back to the Run.... Started the run with BD ran the first Km with him, but he was too fast, found it difficult to keep pace with him,... Then I joined Madhur the Gyan-Ganga of Marathon.. He carries HRM and pace moniter ... I tght y not make u of the technology :)

The initial pace was at 4:30 finish... Then Madhur Suggested its too hot-humid so we need to drop the pace... We were now looking at 5:15 finish....

Madhur suggested BD to drop his pace.... But BD has his own style of running..!! He doesnt give a DAMN to technology...

Ran for 8kms with him( till the end of peddar road slope)... My pace dropped further.... Then Madhur disappeared...

From the other side of the Lane Met Ayush (14km mark) and Sanghi....

Both running his first HM were quite excited Ayush was excited for completing it in 2:30, whereas Sanghi was excited about the girls( short skirts/ 2 piece)...

Just before the 17km Rajat over took me.... on the other side of the LAne waved to Ghod who was behind by leass thn a KM.... Everything looked well till then.. No physical pain or mental drain......

BUt then the feet started aching, couldn't put my feet on ground... I decided that I would walk- run till 28kms, would drop out after that.....

Then came Chingi from behind, he encouraged me to continue running.... We started doing 2min run 1 min walk... Was finding it difficult to do that too... Then I saw Dr Roy walking ahead of me.... Which means that despite I running till 21km mark he was walking faster than me !!! I & chingi tried to keep with pace wid him.. couldn't do so for for thn 3km....

It must have been 10, sun was Blazing Hot..! crowd had started thinning...water stations were disappearing....

The first tghts of taking a taxi started coming to my mind.... Chingi asked me continue till the start of the sea link...I decided to continue till there and will then take cab from there....

Reaching the sea link Chingi said " Chall yaar cross kar le, sea link par decide kar lengey kab taxi main baithna hai" From behind came walking a group of 3-4 old aged(mid 60's) uncles, they encouraged us to keep walking with them,,, But they too were too fast for us...

The only incentive of climbing the link was that I will get to cross the next two detectors at 24 and 30km before 12:40.....

We started climbing the link..... 24 km RFID detector, I land my feet on it NO BEEP.... and my heart broke... I check it with Chingi if it beeped for him, he too said no......

400mts onto the bridge finish vehicle came to announce that roads will open and we can board it if we wish too,,,, I imagined Ghoda and Gandhi both sitting inside it :)..... I thn tght if anyone of them was inside then they would have definitely waved at me and ask me to join them !!

But Alas it didnt happened...:( Otherwise I would have boarded it right away....

Blazing Sun greeted us at the bridge..... I bowed to Surya Deva and said" Raksha Karna Bhagwaan"....dont kill me or make me suffer due to dehydration.....

Continued walking thinking better I should have taken the CAB at the start of the bridge... What is the point of taking the CAB from the other side, when the same cab would have taken me back to the starting point.....!!!! and Besides I wud have to pay the toll too!!

Reached the end of the bridge, no sign of TAXI :((

Meanwhile Ghoda raced to me.... Was Happy to see him, got another partner and motivation to reach the end line.....

Now it was Chingis turn to give up..I told him we have reached 29km mark so just another 13km to go....Motivated him to keep moving... Now I was moving just becoz Ghoda was moving....

Ghoda reveled why is is he still continuing...... Besides carrying the haunting memories of last yr run he had a target which could have made any lame dumb-ass male to move his legs,,,, But for him it was the guilt of taking the taxi for 3kms last whn he had run... HE advised me if you take the taxi you have this guilt for the next yr...

But for me the more than the Taxi thing it was the loser thought of not being able to finish in stipulated time....

But I had nothing to race for... No Gf no Fiancee, neither had I trained once for the race.... I had crossed the max distance I had ever done..... I wasn't making to the finish line before 12:40...No photu finish.....Waht i was looking at was a dismal 7 hrs finish...

By now all the Kms markers were taken off the road....... We didnt knew where we were standing..... It was freaking bull shit to continue running....Couldn't spot more thn 7 ppl walking to reach the finish line.... For the older ones the achievement was to reach the finish the line...

Chingi was making a pittstop at every juice stall that fell on the way.... This was irking me as I didnt wanted to stand stall.... I wanted to keep moving my dumb ass. for no reason.... Ghoda didnt stop for us, he kept moving for the good... Being under the favor of Chingi supporting me when I had given, I couldnt have given up on him.. So I waited for him where ever he wanted to take break.....!!

Moved for about 1.5 kms then came the breaking point..... Chingi * I decided to take the taxi... no more of the chutiyatik madness....

Sat in CAB first crossed goda(~200mts,Attria Mall),Chingi asked me to pickup Ghoda, I told him he has target lets not derail him...We hid in the car so tht he dont see us,,,

then crossed two guys wearing white Nutrilite T-shirts.... Chingi suddenly suffered the "GUILT" I too felt a bit bad, got down before Haji Ali- chingi paid 13 rs to taxi

And we were on our foot again :( Chingi asked me Ghodey wht are you gng to say to ghoda? I told him we can say we crossed him at Haji Ali..I knew you cannot hide the lie when there is only one way to reach the the finish point and just 7 runners in the hunt...!!

Reached the deadly Peddar road flyover.... With no water in the last 4 kms, was feeling the thirst... Then came 3 angels... An uncle with his two daughters was still serving water/orange/iglucose biscuits to the runners.... It was 1:130pm then..I and Chingi were overwhelmed...

We saluted the spirit of Mumbai and moved ahead.... Chingi rang to his boss to find out how many Kms were left... He told 3kms, I knew it was more thn tht..but i believed him, just to give some peace to my mind.... there came guy in Honda City carrying water bottles in his car...!!! I gulped the 300lts aquafina...

Chowpaty looked like a endless road... never seemed to be ending.... After that met a hot couple...:D

The lady offered a cold bisleri right out from the icebox and few raisins( kishmish) ...... Drank a few mls poured the rest on my head.....

reached a point where another gentleman said 3 more kms... I again knew it is more than 3 km...

All the Way I kept looking for the signal which turns left towards the finishing point...from there it is about 2 kms....

First signal no.... :( .. Near the first signal me a 45 yr old uncle..... He was walking all the way clicking the pics...He carried a bag with his SLR and a water pouch.... I and Chingi joined him.... He kept chattng all the way tht sometime made it a little less painful to reach the finish line...

Sometime it was irritating, i felt like let me walk like a zombie dont disturb else I'll kill you...

100 mts before the finish line he asked me to smile and not look pathetic... !!!

I try to smile pulling my lips apart... I tght of running the last 100 mts, but felt like a loser... so just kept walking along the pavement.....

Touched the finish line but with no sense of accomplishment....2 mins later came chingi...

THe uncle asked me to take his photu with VT in the backdrop... He wanted precision in every pic..... After completing 42kms this guy still had the enthu for other things...Why doesnt he run is ass off and go home...?...I just wanted rush home.... Chingis boss( he had collected it for Chingi in adv) told they are still giving the finishers medal, I rushed to the holding area..Thinking to grab one for me and Ghoda... Alas!!

Waited for Ghoda he was in there in 10 mins... I was eagerly waiting to see Ghodas reaction when he touches the fnish line :) Ghoda Hugged ( not me!!) ... Seeing his reaction Finally I had a genuine smile on my face... :D

The only guilt I had in the end was I lied to Ghoda about overtaking him at Haji Ali.. For Ghoda finishing before would have been icing on the cake..!! But he seemed too busy eating the cake.!!

Today when Ghoda came to know I took the cab, he was elated, he came to verandah a jumped wid joy :)

I am now guilt free.....

BUt I am saddened coz all those old age people crushed and my self respect & my ego... running and walking past me on their way to Glory...!!

Race Result: 1) Gandhi

2) Ghoda

3) Shukla (Disqualified)

The Moral of the story: 1) Run the FULL MONTY only if you have a GF and u wish to prove your manhood....!

2) Dont Run if you haven't trained and you know you dont have anyone to prove to!

3) Be a volunteer once in my life for the runners helping them refuel till the end....!( conclusion from discussion with Chingi & Ghoda)